The Newest Threat on College Campuses: Microaggression

Andrew Klavan

Well, it’s back to school time and all across our country, college students are suffering from an insidious form of oppression called microaggressions.  These are defined as commonplace verbal or, behavioral indignities…  that communicate racist or sexist slights or insults…”

Microaggressions take place when, for instance, a woman sees a black male and clutches her purse more tightly making it too damn hard for him to snatch the thing away from her… or when two men hear a woman speaking and look at one another like this [makes a face] the universal sign language for “irrational woman.”  So don’t let them see you do that because you know women.  [makes the face]

To combat the tragedy of microagression, we here at the Revolting Truth have collected some real life MA experiences and submitted them to experts for commentary and advice. Trigger warning:  these are genuine examples of microaggression and may cause you to experience some of the terrifying injustice of being a minority or female college student in today’s America.

All right, here’s one from the website, The MicroAgressions Project:  [quote] “I wanted to get my nephew a My Little Pony coloring book since I like MLP…  My brother, however, objected…  I ended up getting my nephew a Batman one, but I don’t like Batman.  It made me feel angry and sad that my brother is so entrenched in stereotypical gender roles.”

Wow.  We submitted this sad story to Aran, an Iraqi Yazidi women, who sent this reply:

“Dear American College student.  I am very sorry to hear of your My Little Pony incident.  I perhaps can identify with some of your suffering as I was forced to watch while Islamists murdered my beloved husband and children before selling me into sexual slavery.  Like you, I too felt forced into stereotypical gender roles.  I hope your nephew enjoys his Batman.”

Here’s another tragic tale of micro-aggressive woe from a powerful performance piece called I Too Am Harvard:  [quote] “I am a Harvard university student of mixed race, and people sometimes come right up to me and ask, ‘What are you?’”

We sent this description to our friend Lisa in the Central African Republic.  Lisa gave this helpful reply:

“Dear Harvard student.  How rude to be asked what race you are. It reminds me of the time I was hunted down by Muslim Seleka Rebels, dragged into the jungle and raped for hours before being set on fire.  Even though I know how difficult it is there, I too sometimes dream of going to Harvard.”

Well, thanks to Lisa for that sympathetic reply.  Here’s one more true life atrocity from an American female pre-med student.  [quote]  “My MCAT instructor keeps referring to the unnamed writers of certain passages with male pronouns. It made me feel stupid and unvalued…”

Our correspondent Fairly in Afghanistan responds…  “Dear American pre-med student.  How terrible to have to overcome such difficulty as male pronouns in getting to go to school.  I too have suffered difficulties getting to school when men rode by on motorbikes and threw acid in my face.  Of course this is nothing compared to male pronouns, but I do sort of miss my face sometimes. I used to be very pretty.”

Well, I hope this advice has been helpful to all those American college students suffering from microaggression.  We here at the Revolting Truth understand that this sort of savage oppression can really harsh your buzz, especially if you already have a hangover and crabs.

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UK: Parents remove 14 children from school after headmistress bans packed lunches

Parents have removed around 14 children from a primary school after they introduced a blanket ban on packed lunches.

Milefield Primary School in Grimethorpe, Barnsley, South Yorks., only informed parents of their controversial move in a letter sent home with the children on the last day of term in July.

And despite repeated calls from parents for their thoughts to be heard, the new dinner policy was implemented when the kids returned to school last Friday.

Angry dad Adam Martin, 31, has now taken his three children, Harry, four, George, five and Amelia, seven, out of the school after losing all faith over the lunch dispute.

Gas engineer Adam said: "I feel like our freedom of choice has been taken away.

We were appalled to be told our children couldn't take in pack lunches and further incensed with how the school have dealt with the situation.  "We like our kids to have a packed lunch because, not only does it save us money, but it also allows you to be able to let your children eat what they like.  "When you have fussy eaters, as children quite often are, it means you can make sure they are eating a full balanced meal.

"The pack lunches we make are healthy and nutritious, we don't need somebody to tell us what our children should be eating.  "We feel very strongly about this. I'm sure this must be violating some kind of human right."

According to their strict new rules the only options open to parents now is to let them have a school cooked lunch or to go home.

Adam is part of a Facebook group of around 60 parents who are angered about the move.  "So far," he said, "around 14 kids have been removed from the school because of this.

"Another problem with this is that the school only has one choice of meal so the kids either have to like it or lump it."

Another parent, IT consultant Mick Curphey, 39, has kept his children, William, eight, and Beth, seven, in school as he does not want to disrupt them, but he is angry at the decision and is hoping for pack lunches to be reintroduced.

He and wife Debbie, 37, an estimator for a manufacturing company, both work but are still unhappy at the extra cost.  Mick said: "The cost of packed lunches is swallowed up in our weekly shopping bill so we basically don't feel the cost. But if we have to pay for lunches it is more money we have to find to pay another bill. Our food bill will not come down.

"Every evening we make pack lunches for all four of us for the next day. We consider our packed lunches to be healthy.

"The cost of school meals for our two - £3.50 a day - works out at around £682.50 a year - £80 more than our energy bills.  "That is an awful lot of money to find. We know some people who have four kids and when you look at those costs it just gets atrocious.

Milefield Primary School are proud of their decision to ban pack lunches.

Headteacher Paula Murray said: "We're not forcing anyone. We're encouraging the promotion of healthy eating and it's had such positive impact and we're only into day four of the actual programme being run out in the school.

"The parents have the choice of taking their children home if they don't want them to have a school meal.

"We have got to work towards what's best for our children and a large proportion of children in the school - over 97 per cent of parents are in favour of the changes."

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Army officer told he cannot enter his daughter's school while wearing a uniform

Lieutenant Colonel Sherwood Baker says he is just a father who was trying to help his daughter find her way at her new high school.

Lt... Baker has served in the Army for 24 years. This past week he was told by Rochester Adams high school security that if he wanted to get into the high school with his daughter he was going to have to go home and change his clothes.

Baker's wife, Rachel Ferhadson says, "Before he was allowed in, the security guard stopped him and said sorry your not allowed in the school. Security told him men and women in uniform weren't allowed because it may offend another student."

Lt.er says he was simply coming to the school to speak with his daughter's counselor regarding her class schedule but was turned away at the doors because he was not wearing a tie.

Rochester Schools superintendent Robert Shaner, who is a veteran himself, quickly took care of the situation apologizing to the family for their troubles.

Shaner sent a letter to Fox 2 which says: "The district has apologized for any perception that individuals in uniform are not welcome in the school. The district does not have a policy excluding individuals in uniform and will be working with administration and the firm that handles our security to make sure district policies are understood and communicated accurately."

The Baker family has scheduled a meeting with the principal of Adams high school in the coming days.

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